Tuesday, April 22, 2008

I'll have the waffles and a side order of stupid, please... Barack Obama eats breakfast--madness ensues...

Short recap of the oft-repeated tale:

Barack Obama went to a diner. He kissed babies, shook hands and ordered breakfast. He started eating. A reporter asked him a question. He said "Why can't I just eat my waffle?"

This is not news. It is not interesting. It is a politician eating breakfast. One can't peer deep into his soul based on his response. One can't reasonably extrapolate anything about his overall willingness to engage the press based on his desire to eat his fucking waffle at that given moment. One can't maintain, with a straight face, that the question was so challenging that Obama had no choice but to hide behind his waffle.

It is not evidence of a trend. It is not proof of a character flaw. Not all breakfasts are moments of great significance.

The dude was eating and didn't really want to answer a question. The end.

You would think that in a relatively educated and literate nation such as our own, that a guy eating a waffle on a campaign stop wouldn't engender a great deal of interest.

You would think that we'd be smart enough to realize that any one of a million different things is probably more important than a dude eating a motherfucking waffle.

We are not.

We, or at least some of us, really do appear to be that stupid. Folks are analyzing Barack Obama's waffle incident. They are talking about the ramifications of Wafflegate. Some are interpreting it as evidence of bigger things. They are casting it as a piece in a puzzle they've already solved.

Rooty tooty, fresh and fruity. Barack Obama's desire to eat a little waffle is news.

One of the most common strategies for issue-fying the waffle is to point out that Obama is ducking questions not only at breakfast, but all the time. After all, he hasn't made himself available to press for 10 whole days. Wafflegate is proof that he's hiding, people argue.

Of course, he's also spent the last 10 days working his ass of all over Pennsylvania, which cuts into available chit-chat time.

Oh, and there's also the oft-forgotten fact that he HAS made himself available to the media. In fact, he's given DOZENS of interviews in the past ten days. He's been sitting down with local PA papers and media outlets instead of jabbering with the national press. Why? My guess is that the Obama campaign thinks they'll get better Pennsylvania mileage out of Pennsylvania media than by screwing around with the nationals. They might be wrong about that, but it's a mighty stretch to claim he's completely inaccessible.

Let's look at this way. Angelina Jolie's breasts are inaccessible to me. So are her buttocks. She won't give me access. If I ran into her at IHOP and asked her to allow me to caress her breasts and buttocks, she might politely rebuke me, asking why she can't just eat her waffle. On the other hand, if I were Brad Pitt and the two of us were home alone, I'd stand a good chance of spending the night going to town on Angelina. My point: access is all about who you are and where you are.

Anyone who is currently pretending the waffle incident matters should immediately screw his or her fucking head on straight, apologize to every single person they've insulted by pretending this story is meaningful and then place their hand in a hot waffle iron for 30 seconds.

That includes, but is not limited to, the following:

Jeralyn at TalkLeft calls it a "waffle controversy" and claims that the breakfast tale is a big deal because Obama doesn't give reporters a lot of access. That might be because they're a bunch of assholes who won't let a guy eat a waffle, huh?

Delilah Boyd wonders what kind of candidate would "pitch a hissy fit" over a question right before a primary? I wonder what kind of blogger would pitch a hissy fit over the guy wanting to eat his waffle and who'd give him a "waffler of the year award".

Don Singleton hints that Obama might have wanted to eat his breakfast because the question was just too tough. Maybe it wasn't hunger, but an inability to answer. Considering the question was about Jimmy Carter's sit-down with Hamas and the fact that Obama has remarked on the matter and is fully aware of it, that seems unlikely. Nice try, Don. Go eat your waffle.

Liberal Rapture calls Obama a man-child and argues that one must make a choice between waffles and running for office. Here's an idea... Maybe a guy could eat a waffle, wipe the syrup from the corner of his mouth and then go back to campaigning. Just an idea, "numb nuts".

The Confluence asks, "Did the “bitter” gun-toting Archie Bunkers hear him whining like that?" No, they didn't. They were too busy eating their waffles, a courtesy usually extended to all at a diner.

Share/Save/Bookmark



Technorati Tags: Del.icio.us Tags: Furl Tags:

63 comments:

  1. What that reporter deserved was a spoonful of fist. Let the man eat his breakfast okay?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anon-

    Or a forkful of "fuck you", perhaps?

    Yours truly,
    John Brown
    A Spoonful of Sugar

    ReplyDelete
  3. TalkLeft used to be a pretty interesting site, but it has rapidly degenerated into teh stupid. That's a shame. I mean, Taylor Marsh was always a jackass, so her transformation into a 24/7 Obama-bashing Hilldo is not a loss for the left blogosphere. But I am sorry that TalkLeft chose to jump into the same toilet. Oh well. That's the way the waffle crumbles, I guess.

    ReplyDelete
  4. "That might be because they're a bunch of assholes who won't let a guy eat a waffle, huh?"

    Exactly. And it's not just at Barack Obama. It's directed at everyone running for elected office. The press and the American people, frankly, are often kind of dickish and have a hard time just letting people have a life and be a normal human being and have their own needs taken care of outside of the politics.

    It's stupid, really. We just love being assholes who can't let people eat their goddamn waffles, all the time, because, being dicks, we are convinced that nothing is more important than whatever serious thing that we want to discuss or have acted on in the moment.

    It's fuckin' insane, is what it is. And it leaves more sane people to want to stay out that of that process, we are such dicks.

    So, in the name of leaving behind the dickishness, let's the the candidates eat their waffles.

    And if you can't do that, fuck you you fuckin' dick. You will not be appeased this fuckin' election, you heartless sack of shit.

    Let the candidates eat their goddamn waffles. And figure out that the problem is you.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Betty-

    Hilldo (alt. spelling "hildo"?) is very awesome.

    And I'm not just being syrupy.

    Yours,

    John Brown
    Scissor Kicker

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ben-

    Don't hold anything back, man!

    Seriously, I thought I was rantastic. You are on a different plane right now.

    And you are also right. Everyone assumes their "need" of the moment trumps whatever anyone else is doing. That's particularly true of media types and it's evident when a guy won't let another guy eat his god-damned waffle.

    Later gator,

    John Brown
    Director of Operations

    ReplyDelete
  7. The plate with the leftover waffle,sausage and silverware is now on e-bay.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anon-

    I might have considered bidding, but there was an insurmountable problem...

    The sausage touched the maple syrup.

    I cannot abide by meat/syrup contact.

    Yours,
    John Brown
    Gourmand

    ReplyDelete
  9. TalkLeft I'd heard of. How did you dredge up these other idiots?

    ReplyDelete
  10. joshua-

    i did a little blog search and just picked the most recent waffle entries.

    that was my methodology. not particularly impressive, huh?

    yours today and tomorrow,

    john brown
    burger king lookalike

    ReplyDelete
  11. mrs . butterworth & Mr. Ed working the drive-thruFebruary 18, 2016 at 1:45 PM

    Mr. Bush--u r as open as a can of b.b. ! 8th anniversary 29 feb-Mr. Bush murders a man at a Las vegas motel, America. But while u & ur Jews r plotting 2 kill even more Americans on American soil, DRPy Inc. is developing something so unreal...organic tv. 11 million ppl able to dream at the exact same time. No need for tv? Imagine the press conf. It will be announced when there is a pro-Palesine (no Israel) pro-NAU (no America), pro-choice (no niggers)Republican president. Sorry if I spilled the beans, DRPy...crazy...

    ReplyDelete
  12. Canada Mallory 4 the 1980s & the 22nd centuryFebruary 18, 2016 at 1:58 PM

    That's all I know. As far as the Bushes-they killed ALOT. That's no horse pastry.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ok , Mr. Bush you are hated for absolutely no reason. None. Whatever you say.

      Delete
  13. test the waters, Mallory,if you will...itsway too soon, friendsFebruary 19, 2016 at 8:43 PM

    People pressed for time, the blind can benefit. Conscious entertainment seems abit old-fashioned, now. However, the Junited States (a terror state) would never allow such a demonstration. P.S. Second Amendment. Guns=liberty. Don't you ever let your trigger finger lose any of its magic. DRPy u never have to utter a single word. You are apart of our minds-all of the time.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Mallory "t" loves wiccan jewelryFebruary 19, 2016 at 9:01 PM

    Millions of people able to dream the same exact dream at the exact same time. Yes, that is what I meant to type but when I heard the news I was so excited my typing could not keep up with my thoughts. Of course I was translating my thoughts from french to english. The witches even ignore insiders because we are still not one of "them'.

    ReplyDelete
  15. You think you know but you do not, eh?February 19, 2016 at 9:11 PM

    They would never allow it because of military.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Mallory T traveled from the big 80sFebruary 19, 2016 at 9:21 PM

    I cannot tell you anymore. That is all. Free markets, free minds. Go shopping. It always feels so good when you buy yourself a vintage watch from the modern art 80's.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Can you just go out and expose these things? Not that easy. They train terrorists. Hide behind the seal or the flag, making perverse deals while pointing their fingers. Junited States? They're open. Then you have the secret societies. They're notbudging. Under many, many layers. I was fortunate enough to obtain the bits of infornmation. Wish I could do more. Regards,Mallory.

    ReplyDelete
  18. It is not the time. Too soon. That is the message. Do I agree with it? No. I do not agree. Maybe there is a reason for it. I do not know.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Harper Lee is no more !February 20, 2016 at 12:15 AM

    To Kill a Mockingbird author has expired, btw.

    ReplyDelete
  20. When beans about Bush/Obama murders were being spilled, Bush went over to Africa to meet with Obama and they plotted the train explosion in Quebec. They keep killing to cover up their previous killings. When Bush was president,sarcastic staff members used to call him "nigger nostrils" behind his back. When DRP (AllStar)revealed this to 76 s/he was holding the classic 80s hi-nrg record "I'm on fire" by Kelly Marie (on You Tube mus777ya).

    ReplyDelete
  21. Its infinite -like your tax dollars. Sincerly, Mallory T(ruth)February 20, 2016 at 12:51 AM

    The murders will go on and on and on to try and silence people-and the media.

    ReplyDelete
  22. P.S. Don't forget the destruction. But their properties, their libraries, their institutions and their families are fine!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Brenden Laughter from outside of LavalFebruary 20, 2016 at 8:01 AM

    The Press is only as free as you want it to be. The media abuses its power as well. AllStar was a song recorded at a now defunct recording studio. A now extinct record label. The singer was Dave Pescatore. It was recorded on 4 May 1979. It was never released because it sounded too much like Stevie- it was also disco. People were laughing. Dave looked incredibly foolish. It was actually a pretty incredible dance track, however. Best vocalist (if you are reading this, Dave, hope it put a smile on that gorgeous face of yours). But that's politics. In 1979 disco was on its way out. On a much more serious note, an Anglo-America would be a stronger union than the U.S. It could be viewed as an extension of the old U.S.A. or a brand new country. A little something for everyone-and an economic boom like no other. It would be a safer place-strategically. Taking on ISIL as well as Israeli terror, Christian-domestic extremists as well as the savage blacks out on the street who "suffer" from dependency & laziness. But politicians must be careful not to generalise groups of people. They need to be more specific. Terroristic Israeli groups, Muslim extremist terror groups, state-sanctioned terror groups, Christian/domesticated terror groups. You cannot unfairly call out entire groups of people because you are unfairly targeting those who are not terrorists (criminals). Specifics, specifics, specifics. You'll get your point across without the message being lost inside insulting rhetorical horseshit.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Mallory, your the latest "spilling the beans" on lots of people and things & exposing their secret political preferences. Oui! Thanks for the insight. I saw you the other day buying what I thought was a dog. Maybe it was a cat.

    ReplyDelete
  25. No Brenden it was not a cat. You cannot be too specific because you can give away the answer and all sorts of legal "ramifs"."SLEEPTV" is real, however. The witches are distrustful. Esp of the Jews & Africans. Its built into their belief system. Everyone else is just "ok". I could not keep from laughing MY ASS OFF ON THAT ONE! Everyone else-just"ok". Maybe Dave is struggling with that. I don't know. I know as much as you at this point. I already knew about the long ago record pressing. You know I don't even care for communicating in English. There are those who have to know more & more because they are in love and they do not know a second language. How can you not know a second language? We live in a global society and my "American cousins" only know one language-"American".

    ReplyDelete
  26. English is there if I need it but I prefer speaking in my native tongue. I am not being a linguistic snob.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Sleep television? How the hell am I supposed to wake up! Burning bed , alright. P.S. English and Germans are "tops" to the BTW clan.

    ReplyDelete
  28. The 1980s were wierd. All of it. The music, the punk rock-new wave fashions. The teens and 20somethings who helped shape it. It gets wierder. The politics were mostly conservative. High Energy, Punk Skunk Reaganites? Alot of them were missing screws. Upside down. Metal hair bands, the Valley Girls (fer sher); they were crazy. The whole GenX at that time was strange. Even their older peers did not seem wrapped too tightly.I was born in '90, so my point of view is going to be a lot different. Not much in common I can tell you that!

    ReplyDelete
  29. You forgot to mention break dancers. There's so much more! There is a little thin line between artistic brilliance and madness. True. But I was born in the summer of 1963. Your generation can never minimize the 80s youth culture and its global reach- without a modern internet. But a crude BBS. No comparison, 1990.

    ReplyDelete
  30. They did not have the resources to treat mental illness like they do today. The 80s was crazy.

    ReplyDelete
  31. s/he even whispers-God please hear the world screamingFebruary 21, 2016 at 1:08 AM

    Do I think DRP is possessed? Yes. I believe.

    ReplyDelete
  32. S/he whispers & I pray to God-please hear us. I believe "Sleep Vision" is evil. We all need to be praying . The world has lost its center. When you have ineffective leaders, who better to take over the wheel than satan. Satan hesself !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Music mix like a dream mix? Like an 80s music video? They pray through sleep.

      Delete
  33. You cannot compete with Christ. I don't care who you are.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Especially you hess. You especially.

    ReplyDelete
  35. meet me in my dreamsFebruary 23, 2016 at 1:07 PM

    Obama competes with baboons and orangutans.Those are his ""bros". Bush competes with alcoholism. Sadistic ego-maniacs.Use the American flag as bathroom tissue. hess on the other hand is like Hinrg-leaves u exhausted. S/he competes with not only Jesus, but the Pope & the Dalai Lama.Yes, I believe, too. You never met this person.I'm a follower and a GenXXX'er. No different than followers of JC.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hey lunch time threadersFebruary 24, 2016 at 12:20 PM

      hess compliments the Pope-not in competition. Keep G.Bay open so the govt can waterboard Bush & Obama, etc.PUBLIC SERVANT SEIAL KILLERS BELONG THERE.

      Delete
  36. Killer Apes. Everyone has been silenced, threatened. Justice is not being served. They actually threatened a hermaphrodite with rape and torture if s/he exposes Mr. Obama's two-timing homosexual crusades and murders. Left traumatized. But that's not even all of it.Just a little bit. Pretty sick country.

    ReplyDelete
  37. America; what's not to love?February 26, 2016 at 8:26 PM

    There are things we do not know about and can never be revealed to the American public and to the world. GX3 people need to understand this.

    ReplyDelete
  38. GenX3 college girl trying 2 understand "America"February 26, 2016 at 11:50 PM

    America is a preverted place. Countries are entitled to secrets. There are unknowns. I get that. Canada too! But hiring the mentally ill,gangsters and/or terrorists (same thing) to kill grandmothers, grandfathers, little kids. Torment the vulnerable. I'm at a loss of words. Can somebody help me. So how do we define "America" ?

    ReplyDelete
  39. GenX3 college girl trying 2 understand "America"February 27, 2016 at 12:20 AM

    prevert: beyond redemption.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Hillary Clinton & The CrusadersFebruary 27, 2016 at 8:57 AM

    I wanna go down on Phyllis Schlafly.

    ReplyDelete
  41. sexy caucasian conservative male wolf into lily-white sheepFebruary 27, 2016 at 12:00 PM

    Clinton can do whatever she wants. She does it anyway. Me? I'm dying to mount a tight Molisian intersex pussy.

    ReplyDelete
  42. GenX3 college girl trying 2 understand "America"February 27, 2016 at 7:54 PM

    "It" sounds like a sheep & "It" wears fancy 80s threads. Ba-a-ah! amp? I guess you have to keep in mind when dashing DC wolves unzip their pants their brains fall out.

    ReplyDelete
  43. throw in the towel, americaFebruary 27, 2016 at 10:11 PM

    Knowing all that you know, you gotta be an idiot to salute the american flag. Throw it in the trash where it belongs. Ignore it. Turn your backs to it. Live your lives as if it does not even exist. Its for them. As I said before-america is a sick country run by some pretty sick people. Purposely targeting & killing a judge, little kids, etc. Yeah, thats the country where I want to be. The motive behind those brutal, racist attacks is just as shocking as the killings itself. Never stop talking about it. Never. My thoughts are with the victims & with Dave.

    ReplyDelete
  44. they call american leaders "Public Servants" -serving themselves until it disintegratesFebruary 27, 2016 at 10:32 PM

    american ideals don't mean anything. All of those crimes. So many secrets. Its a power grab for the very few. They always use the excuse its to remain competitive with the other countries. One up on the enemy. But so much of what they do is on american soil targeting their own. I made my parents take down the flag. It was hanging from the porch. It looked so beautiful one summer morning. I took a picture of it. It was there for years. My parents took it down after I told them why they should.

    ReplyDelete
  45. They use the military, too. Its all in the name of freedom and it is interwoven within the american rag. It is horse shit.

    ReplyDelete
  46. living a lie, americaFebruary 27, 2016 at 11:14 PM

    america targets their own. Elderly people, children, etc. america targets foreign allies and their innocent citizens. But america does not target most of their VERY own. You know, those "important" people in govt who only work 2 days a week. Back in '88 Flight 103. US Govt had govt officials and even the singing group "The Four Tops" removed from the plane before it went down in Scotland. Although things have since soured abit between entertainers (actors,recording artists,pro-sports stars) and the govt. Wait until you find out why they really murdered flight 103 ! I say it again. Pretty sick country.

    ReplyDelete
  47. living a lie, americaFebruary 27, 2016 at 11:46 PM

    btw, I served in the military. My fiance served in the military and all four of my brothers served in the military. How many politicians served ? Because I make over a certain amount, I pay more than my fair share in taxes. Nothing I have typed is deemed "classified". Its out.I never let down america. america let me down. What did I actually fight for? For Obama to engage in affairs? A free pass for this guy to go out & murder anyone he so chooses.

    ReplyDelete
  48. living a lie, americaFebruary 27, 2016 at 11:57 PM

    His red and blue buddies in government keep giving him free passes to murder & commit all kinds of crime and they get themselves something in return. Not supposed to work that way. Or use the military the way Obama has been using it.

    ReplyDelete
  49. hippocrits/do not understand these underground disgruntled ###February 28, 2016 at 12:25 AM

    I love reading these threads and how the threaders use certain characters and spellings to send special hidden meanings to one another. Its your right. Whether your all witches or Mason-types. You want a free and open society but not for your groups. So many secrets? Your apart of those secrets.

    ReplyDelete
  50. don't blame them for staying awayFebruary 28, 2016 at 12:33 AM

    They even fight amongst each other. No wonder so many of your secret members choose to stay away from internet.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Dxn't hex us dxn't sue usFebruary 28, 2016 at 2:34 AM

    Huh? Wish I was apart of their society. No secret movement here. That No. American Order & private police. Most of us are GenX3'ers who came up with codes similar to their codes. We started our own sub-groups with people from all backgrounds.We have a few key people who were allowed access (at one time) but not allowed to join. We are the excluded majority so we developed our own "Order".We are in no way connected to DRPy and we do not pretend to have anything to do with them. We think the world of them and would do anything to join.

    ReplyDelete
  52. The key people are old friends and people that knew hess in the real world-not the subconscious one.

    ReplyDelete
  53. "Them" as in "Wicca". DRPy is one groundhog. hess is the same groundhog as well.We hope to have the groundhog shine a light and come forward>we are not harassers just groupies! Fans! We appreciate a peak into their world. We know hess saw some old friends and was just as appreciative. We are not prying. We know the only correct information we get is through them. Sincerly, GenX3 P.S.We are not responsible for some of the comments left on here by others.Most likely from Obama staff members worried the world will find out he is a crack addict.

    ReplyDelete
  54. The President is not a "crack" addictFebruary 28, 2016 at 3:00 AM

    No problem, Obama. You are no crack addict!

    ReplyDelete
  55. Michelle Obama- pretend you and your gay husband are a regular married couple and have him give you a good long french kiss for the cameras. Suck on his talented anal-feces tongue.....EEEEEWWWWW!!!

    ReplyDelete
  56. Thoroughly grotesque is an understatement.

    ReplyDelete
  57. I'd rather have a gay president than a straight one who wants to fuck your in-between leader's vagina.

    ReplyDelete
  58. Generation XXX's circus freak leader does not acknowledge you either!February 28, 2016 at 5:49 AM

    In-between, as in not quite male-or female. Now that's grotesque. Who would want to be that? I would prefer to be black than be that! At birth hospitals give them a white baby blanket. Not blue, not pink, but white. You can easily dismiss the optimists and label hermaphrodites as a genetic freak of nature (they are). They throw everything off balance and bring down the planet. Not good.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Terror from the Year 5000February 28, 2016 at 10:29 AM

    Why did s/he & those other New Wavers (back in the 80's) put designs all over their faces ? I saw the ads. They were all sick.

    ReplyDelete